Sadness is…
I’m not sad for what i might never have… I’m sad for what i had and I lost.
Sadness comes when you realize how good something is/was/could be,
but it’s too late to do anything to save it from dying.
I just can’t seem to understand why love comes and goes so easily to some people…
Why can’t i be like that? Why am I still in love with him then?
Why would I just ignore all of this pain he brought me to be with him again?
I guess it’s mostly because i don’t believe i will find anybody that will make me happier than he did, so I just stick to him as if he was my only salvation. I need to get saved from my own life… How awful is that.
I’ve become a better and more beloved person, for what… For remembering everyday of how good I had it and how bad I lost it all… The pain won’t go away. I really need to find the words to describe this.
If I could compose songs… They would be the sadder ever.
When I try to imagine how my life would be with him now, I only get to the conclusion it would not be possible.
He would be way too incompatible with the people here, my new friends. I wouldn’t be so nice friends with anyone, hence I wouldn’t do half of the things we do all together now…
Would his love be really worth it in long term? Would that happiness really last as it was?
But how could something that felt so right, end up at a given point?
He run away like a coward. He knew that what he did was so bad, he didn’t even dare to face it. How can i love someone like that… Someone who is not responsible enough for his own acts…
And what’s gonna happen with me now?
Gave it all just to lose it.
Tried her hardest just to fail.
Lived a dream just to wake up.
Became a better person just to die.
Loved just to get her heart broken.
Created memories just to keep the pain alive.
Without hope, without faith, without future
as empty as a shell she shall remain.
Rest in peace, you sweet child.
Find the place where you belong,
where your dreams never die,
and you live happy all along.
Where the only law is fair
and nobody cries or hurts.
Rest in peace, you had enough. Fly away, where you can smile again.
She knows she’s gonna hurt those who have her in their hearts.
But she wishes that they will understand…
“Trying to fit a square into a circle is no life”
She’s been poisoned, there’s no escape.
No other options, no other chance.
To die slowly in pain, to never enjoy again.
All this emptiness has no purpose, but only to stop this nonsense.
Here today, gone tomorrow.
