Metamorphosis
What happened to the Rick I fell in love with? What the fuck have you become?
I can barely believe what my eyes see… I don’t know you anymore…
And it’s so hard to take, so hard to understand…
How some people can change so much.
Really, I’ve stayed almost the same steadily for a few years now…
It’s true that I’ve learned a lot, always too late but anyway… I’ve never become something shameful.
And talking about learning… I’ve been told that shit in life happens so you get experience out of it.
But really, isn’t it any other way to learn? Why does it have to destroy and hurt so much?
And why in so unfair ways anyway? And for what purpose?
Today I was wondering that I can’t be so conceited to believe that I already knew/know all of what I’m “supposed” to know to manage a balanced life… Of course I learned things out of what happened to me; things that made me grow inside a little bit wiser and a little bit tough…
But will it make any difference after all?
Even if I’m aware that now I’m more capable of managing my own personal life, I know which mistakes I don’t have to do again, where I need to get better at, etc… Does that change the fact that the odds of finding a future worth living are close to be called a miracle?
Feels, again, like no matter how good someone can be… Luck is all that matters in the end. There’s no such a thing as fairness or “deserveness” (yeah i just made that one up >.<). Some people find their true match, but not all of them are the true match for their own.
Jesus why is all of it so complicated? Now it’s just driving me nuts ._.
